Meet Helen
“I have spent a number of years working with people who are completely burnt out, stressed and truly unaware of their own potential.”
It’s so very lovely to meet you, I am Helen a mindset coach and solutions focused therapist that’s been revolutionising the way busy professionals heal from their burnout.
My friends call me nosey… I prefer inquisitive… Seriously… they do!! But therapy and coaching made me realise I have ALWAYS found people and their behaviour fascinating. It’s something that has stuck with me my entire life. Why do we behave the way we do?? How can we be truly present to enjoy life, what’s the best ways for us to handle life’s challenges and truly excel?
Why being a mindset coach is so important to me??
I have always found other people’s sense of shame of themselves and human suffering hard to tolerate. My entire career has taught me how we are all connected by our basic needs and wants as humans. We all feel the need to be accepted as our true selves and this often leads to us not offering ourselves the compassion we deserve in order to thrive.
I have previously worked in a legal environment which taught me the value of human engagement and the real importance of communication with each other and understanding our own self-worth. Since then…I have been a creative business owner for fourteen years. During this time, I have spoken in Conde Naste about confidence, size diversity and inequality… featured on BBC Wales about stress and sleep along with many other household publications.
I know we hear so many “cookie cutter” pieces of advice when it comes to managing stress and avoiding burn out… but many of these often prove to have varying degrees of success. I have dedicated my time studying and creating solutions focused tools and frameworks for my clients. So, while taking time for yourself is undoubtedly needed to recover from stress and burnout, I also aid my clients healing with a road map and proven tools to help them on their journey.
My sessions are always focused on the person sat in front of me, I want them to feel free to explore their own potential and appreciate who they are. Banishing old behavioural patterns and stop listening to negative self-talk patterns as well as people pleasing.
To move forward, sometimes
we need to glance back…
The Beginning
1985
I am proud to be a rainbow baby, I was born to a Mam and Dad who had previously lost a baby and was very much longed for. They were offered no therapeutic support and were left alone by professionals to grieve. When I was born underweight they panicked I wouldn’t quite make it. But I had no plans to go anywhere!!
I found my childhood tough. I was bigger in size than most children and kids can be cruel. An incident with my head teacher in primary school led me to believe I deserved to be bullied. This is where I learnt the unhealthy behaviour of self-compromise and people pleasing.
In another life I think I would have been a handbag designer, Chanel has my heart. As a child I had an overflowing carboard box filled with handbags of all shapes, sizes and colours. A bit like my favourite childhood series The Raggy Dolls.
One of the most inspirational people of my teenage years was my law teacher. She was the catalyst for me joining the school debate team. I did one mock trial and I was immediately hooked.
I saw law as a vehicle for social justice that continues to serve an ever-changing population. It made me question… how do we develop our sense of right and wrong?? Are we as a society always just… are minorities accounted for fairly for within our legal system?
The Middle Bit
2003
I headed to university and away from home. In lectures I was in my element.
To my friends and peers I appeared confident but my people pleasing habits followed me (clients will know one of my much used phrases is “wherever you go you take you”).
I often overcommitted to plans, I had low self esteem and desperately wanted other people to like me. I felt like I had to be a “nice” person because of how I looked outwardly. I was different, I didn’t belong… I burnt out consistently and frequently.
2007
I started my legal career at a pioneering global law firm gaining experience in court of appeal cases and legal jurisprudence.
2009
I worked in house at a FTSE 100 company. It nurtured my entrepreneurial mindset…
2011
I tied the knot to my husband. I had documented my own wedding plans on a small corner of the Internet. With 78,000 unique views a month I saw the opportunity to turn my musings into a fully-fledged business.
2012
Awards and accolades started rolling in for my business and I frequently address how I had felt isolated and like I didn’t belong when I was planning my wedding. I NEVER saw people the same size as me in any brand or marketing campaigns. It was if people of my size didn’t deserve love… or to be seen.
2013
I was invited by the likes of Burda Publishing and Conde Naste to discuss size diversity. Stepping over the threshold of Vogue House to this day is a career highlight.
It all felt very surreal… did I deserve this success?? Was I working hard enough?? Did people like what I was doing?? Was everyone else happy?? Were people that looked like me meant to be successful??
The Turning Point
2016
I found myself sat on a therapists couch… sobbing. It didn’t matter what I achieved I was never good enough for me. I still continued to say yes to things I didn’t want to do.
I still apologised for my own existence. I longed to belong, I wanted connection, but this was all overridden with the fear of rejection.
The carpet I had used to hide things under since that incident with the head teacher as a child had ended up tripping me up. I had hit the floor and was at my rock bottom.
Piece by piece, I rebuilt me. Rock bottom became my new foundation. I gave myself the space and the time I needed to unpick my own belief system surrounding myself. If I was not my career, if I was not other people’s opinions of me… who was I??
I will forever be grateful for the professionals who provided me with the compassion and belief during this time of my life. I would not be here today without you.
I started to explore new interests.
fell in love with being active and taking care of me. I reached a place where I acknowledged that I was worthy of looking after. This was never simply about a weight loss journey for me. It was about taking time for me.
Weightlifting and being active has taught me so much about grace in failure and humility. It’s reinforced my belief in resilience, in both myself and other people. I have learnt so much about focus, discipline and community even when times seem adverse.
I set myself the challenge of running a half marathon which resulted in me discussing the intrinsic link between mental health and physical health with the likes of BBC2 and Womens Health Magazine.
2019
I qualified as a Solutions Focused therapist, I help busy, professional humans, recognise their own self worth. Taking them from anxious and burnt out to calm, confident and thriving.
I adopted a black cat called mouse. She sometimes puts in a Cameo appearance during sessions. I wanted to call her “Cat” like breakfast in Tiffany’s. She refused to answer and exasperated I called her “Mouse”… she came running to me.
Cheers to the future
In 2023 I was invited to become a UK Delegate for the UN Commission on Women’s Rights. This led me to me to develop Esteem Diversity as an organic extension of my people pleasing course and seminars
“ Teaching the world that you belong and deserve to be heard regardless of your size”
I have a TED X TALK firmly in my sights.
To move forward, sometimes
we need to glance back…
The Beginning
1985
I am proud to be a rainbow baby, I was born to a Mam and Dad who had previously lost a baby and was very much longed for. They were offered no therapeutic support and were left alone by professionals to grieve. When I was born underweight they panicked I wouldn’t quite make it. But I had no plans to go anywhere!!
I found my childhood tough. I was bigger in size than most children and kids can be cruel. An incident with my head teacher in primary school led me to believe I deserved to be bullied. This is where I learnt the unhealthy behaviour of self-compromise and people pleasing.
In another life I think I would have been a handbag designer, Chanel has my heart. As a child I had an overflowing carboard box filled with handbags of all shapes, sizes and colours. A bit like my favourite childhood series The Raggy Dolls.
One of the most inspirational people of my teenage years was my law teacher. She was the catalyst for me joining the school debate team. I did one mock trial and I was immediately hooked.
I saw law as a vehicle for social justice that continues to serve an ever-changing population. It made me question… how do we develop our sense of right and wrong?? Are we as a society always just… are minorities accounted for fairly for within our legal system?
The Middle Bit
2003
I headed to university and away from home. In lectures I was in my element.
To my friends and peers I appeared confident but my people pleasing habits followed me (clients will know one of my much used phrases is “wherever you go you take you”).
I often overcommitted to plans, I had low self esteem and desperately wanted other people to like me. I felt like I had to be a “nice” person because of how I looked outwardly. I was different, I didn’t belong… I burnt out consistently and frequently.
2007
I started my legal career at a pioneering global law firm gaining experience in court of appeal cases and legal jurisprudence.
2009
I worked in house at a FTSE 100 company. It nurtured my entrepreneurial mindset…
2011
I tied the knot to my husband. I had documented my own wedding plans on a small corner of the Internet. With 78,000 unique views a month I saw the opportunity to turn my musings into a fully-fledged business.
2012
Awards and accolades started rolling in for my business and I frequently address how I had felt isolated and like I didn’t belong when I was planning my wedding. I NEVER saw people the same size as me in any brand or marketing campaigns. It was if people of my size didn’t deserve love… or to be seen.
2013
I was invited by the likes of Burda Publishing and Conde Naste to discuss size diversity. Stepping over the threshold of Vogue House to this day is a career highlight.
It all felt very surreal… did I deserve this success?? Was I working hard enough?? Did people like what I was doing?? Was everyone else happy?? Were people that looked like me meant to be successful??
The Turning Point
2016
I found myself sat on a therapists couch… sobbing. It didn’t matter what I achieved I was never good enough for me. I still continued to say yes to things I didn’t want to do.
I still apologised for my own existence. I longed to belong, I wanted connection, but this was all overridden with the fear of rejection.
The carpet I had used to hide things under since that incident with the head teacher as a child had ended up tripping me up. I had hit the floor and was at my rock bottom.
Piece by piece, I rebuilt me. Rock bottom became my new foundation. I gave myself the space and the time I needed to unpick my own belief system surrounding myself. If I was not my career, if I was not other people’s opinions of me… who was I??
I will forever be grateful for the professionals who provided me with the compassion and belief during this time of my life. I would not be here today without you.
I started to explore new interests.
fell in love with being active and taking care of me. I reached a place where I acknowledged that I was worthy of looking after. This was never simply about a weight loss journey for me. It was about taking time for me.
Weightlifting and being active has taught me so much about grace in failure and humility. It’s reinforced my belief in resilience, in both myself and other people. I have learnt so much about focus, discipline and community even when times seem adverse.
I set myself the challenge of running a half marathon which resulted in me discussing the intrinsic link between mental health and physical health with the likes of BBC2 and Womens Health Magazine.
2019
I qualified as a Solutions Focused therapist, I help busy, professional humans, recognise their own self worth. Taking them from anxious and burnt out to calm, confident and thriving.
I adopted a black cat called mouse. She sometimes puts in a Cameo appearance during sessions. I wanted to call her “Cat” like breakfast in Tiffany’s. She refused to answer and exasperated I called her “Mouse”… she came running to me.
Cheers to the future
In 2023 I was invited to become a UK Delegate for the UN Commission on Women’s Rights. This led me to me to develop Esteem Diversity as an organic extension of my people pleasing course and seminars
“ Teaching the world that you belong and deserve to be heard regardless of your size”
I have a TED X TALK firmly in my sights.
