Meet Helen

1985
I am proud to be a rainbow baby, I was born to a Mam and Dad who had previously lost a baby and was very much longed for. They were offered no therapeutic support and were left alone by professionals to grieve. When I was born underweight they panicked I wouldn’t quite make it. But I had no plans to go anywhere!!

I found my childhood tough. I was bigger in size than most children and kids can be cruel. An incident with my head teacher in primary school led me to believe I deserved to be bullied. This is where I learnt the unhealthy behaviour of self-compromise and people pleasing.

In another life I think I would have been a handbag designer, Chanel has my heart. As a child I had an overflowing carboard box filled with handbags of all shapes, sizes and colours. A bit like my favourite childhood series The Raggy Dolls.

One of the most inspirational people of my teenage years was my law teacher. She was the catalyst for me joining the school debate team. I did one mock trial and I was immediately hooked.

I saw law as a vehicle for social justice that continues to serve an ever-changing population. It made me question… how do we develop our sense of right and wrong?? Are we as a society always just… are minorities accounted for fairly for within our legal system?

2003
I headed to university and away from home. In lectures I was in my element.

To my friends and peers I appeared confident but my people pleasing habits followed me (clients will know one of my much used phrases is “wherever you go you take you”).

I often overcommitted to plans, I had low self esteem and desperately wanted other people to like me. I felt like I had to be a “nice” person because of how I looked outwardly. I was different, I didn’t belong… I burnt out consistently and frequently.

2007
I started my legal career at a pioneering global law firm gaining experience in court of appeal cases and legal jurisprudence.

2009
I worked in house at a FTSE 100 company. It nurtured my entrepreneurial mindset…

2011
I tied the knot to my husband. I had documented my own wedding plans on a small corner of the Internet. With 78,000 unique views a month I saw the opportunity to turn my musings into a fully-fledged business.

2012
Awards and accolades started rolling in for my business and I frequently address how I had felt isolated and like I didn’t belong when I was planning my wedding. I NEVER saw people the same size as me in any brand or marketing campaigns. It was if people of my size didn’t deserve love… or to be seen.

2013
I was invited by the likes of Burda Publishing and Conde Naste to discuss size diversity. Stepping over the threshold of Vogue House to this day is a career highlight.

It all felt very surreal… did I deserve this success?? Was I working hard enough?? Did people like what I was doing?? Was everyone else happy?? Were people that looked like me meant to be successful??

2016
I found myself sat on a therapists couch… sobbing. It didn’t matter what I achieved I was never good enough for me. I still continued to say yes to things I didn’t want to do.

I still apologised for my own existence. I longed to belong, I wanted connection, but this was all overridden with the fear of rejection.

The carpet I had used to hide things under since that incident with the head teacher as a child had ended up tripping me up. I had hit the floor and was at my rock bottom.

Piece by piece, I rebuilt me. Rock bottom became my new foundation. I gave myself the space and the time I needed to unpick my own belief system surrounding myself. If I was not my career, if I was not other people’s opinions of me… who was I??

I will forever be grateful for the professionals who provided me with the compassion and belief during this time of my life. I would not be here today without you.

I started to explore new interests.

fell in love with being active and taking care of me. I reached a place where I acknowledged that I was worthy of looking after. This was never simply about a weight loss journey for me. It was about taking time for me.

Weightlifting and being active has taught me so much about grace in failure and humility. It’s reinforced my belief in resilience, in both myself and other people. I have learnt so much about focus, discipline and community even when times seem adverse.

I set myself the challenge of running a half marathon which resulted in me discussing the intrinsic link between mental health and physical health with the likes of BBC2 and Womens Health Magazine.

2019
I qualified as a Solutions Focused therapist, I help busy, professional humans, recognise their own self worth. Taking them from anxious and burnt out to calm, confident and thriving.

I adopted a black cat called mouse. She sometimes puts in a Cameo appearance during sessions. I wanted to call her “Cat” like breakfast in Tiffany’s. She refused to answer and exasperated I called her “Mouse”… she came running to me.